Career Clinic: Glad to be LGBT?

You didn't mention which position you hold at your firm. Associate? Partner? I personally think you should sit back and observe before joining. Human nature means that people are always curious to learn something new about his neighbour. Also, you need to consider the contribution you've made to your firm - were you just a lazy associate sitting in the corner waiting for work to come in? It will all depend on a number of factors but the most important one is what contribution have you made to your firm in the past?

John T -15 Nov 2007 | 12:49

I am part of the LBGT community but have never told my employer or colleagues, as I fear that law firms generally are very conservative and, while they may have an LBGT group to tick the diveristy box, it is by no means guaranteed that the message of diversity and inclusivity has arrived in the hearts and minds of senior management. This is obviously a sad state of affairs, but I prefer to err on the side of caution on this point.

Silence, MC firm -15 Nov 2007 | 12:52

Are you up for partnership soon? If so, you should definitely join. It's unlikely that your firm would want to be seen as openly discriminating and so if you are upfront about your sexuality at a late stage in the process, that could just tip the balance in your favour. I know of at least one woman who announced her pregnancy just days before the final decision was made, making it almost impossible for the firm not to make her up. If, on the other hand, you are not up for partnership any time soon, keep quiet, be discreet and let others fight that battle for you. If you were truly interested in issues beyond your own advancement, you would not be working in the City in the first place.

Ex-MC Lawyer -15 Nov 2007 | 16:37

I'd say do whatever you feel comfortable with/able to do at the moment. If you're not out at all though, from personal experience I'd certainly recommend telling people as and when you feel you can, particularly if you're worried about them finding out. Everywhere's different but I've been out at my two firms (one very stuffy; one not so much so) and to my surprise don't have any regrets or any concerns that it is damaging my partnership prospects. My work actually improved and I certainly found marketing events a lot easier once I'd told my colleagues and stopped worrying about what would happen if they knew. Personally I think visibility is key to fighting discrimination and just being out and that not being a big deal is really useful whether or not you then choose to join the group. I'm tempted to say you can always go to a better firm if your firm's prejudice means they won't promote you but I know life's not that simple. Good luck.

Associate, City -16 Nov 2007 | 14:38

It's a bit sad, isn't it, that even when firms set up groups like this, people are unsure about joining them. Not that I blame them. It just shows exactly how gay-unfriendly City firms have been, and how far they've got to go to gain the trust of their gay staff.

Carl Gardner, headoflegal.blogspot.com -16 Nov 2007 | 21:34

You don't say whether or not you are already "out" at your firm so I'd question whether or not you'd join the group in order to come out or to promote the cause. What purpose does the group have? As a headhunter I'd warn against becoming some sort of agitator within what you describe as a staight and old-fashioned partnership, and if it's simply in order to take the plunge and come out, I'd recommend a more softly softly approach as others suggest. I don't doubt that such groups have a valuable role to play in general but just ask yourself what exactly it will mean at your particular firm.

Headhunter -19 Nov 2007 | 13:10

Ex aequo et bono. Is it fair and equitable to 'sit back' and let others bear the burden/benefit? You are what you are. Advice: declare yourself and join the LGBT.

Good Faith -19 Nov 2007 | 16:26

I can think of at least one openly homosexual partner working at one of the City's most high-profile and prestigious firms. He got where he is by being exceptional at what he does and not by joining the gay and lesbian club or any other club, society or organisation. I would suggest you focused on doing exactly that as well and left matters of a more private nature to the private arena. It shouldn't matter if your gay, straight or anything in the middle nowdays, what should really matter is how well you do you job as a lawyer. Let your place of work judge you on that one thing and nothing else would be my advice to anybody, gay or otherwise.

Headhunter101 -20 Nov 2007 | 16:31

You should probably think about how you currently "live" at your current firm and whether or not you're happy with continuing to exist as you do? Do you refer to girlfriend/boyfriend/partner using neutral language (i.e. "they" or "my partner") preferring to avoid giving the game away/potential embarassment? Or do you readily correct any misunderstandings? Do you want to join the group to out yourself so as to be able to talk freely with colleagues about your life outside the firm, or do you have another reason? - i.e. the whole "I'm not the only one" thing..You should do and be who you're comfortable being - just know that sadly, not everyone may be comfortable with you being you...but...do you really want to be somewhere you can't be you?

Anonymous -21 Nov 2007 | 16:22

Yes, there are a number of conservative City firms where your sexuality may be an issue, but there are at least as many which recognise that it simply doesn't have any bearing on your skill as a lawyer. When joining a firm, you have a general idea of its tolerance in terms of LGBT issues and if there comes a time when you feel that attitudes to your sexuality are having a negative effect on both your career and your general happiness, then maybe it's just time to move on. In the long term, it will be their loss. There are other firms which are accepting on this issue and if your current firm has an intolerant working environment it is effectively restricting the pool of talent from which its lawyers are drawn based on a reason entirely unrelated to legal skills. I say this because I work in a firm where my sexuality is not an issue. I get on with the tasks at hand and have a great rapport with my colleagues (both fee earners and support staff), all of whom are aware that I am gay, but don't treat me or the other gay employees differently to anyone else. So, it's not all bad news. It may be that your firm is more accepting than you think, and as long as you're honest with yourself and with those around, I think you'll engender more respect than negative comments. In the long term, however, if your firm is not good on this issue, move to one that is - you are not going to work to the best of your abilities if at the same time you have to go to the trouble of concealing something which is a key part of who you are.

David, Reed Smith Richards Butler -22 Nov 2007 | 09:53

I find it odd that so many people would recommend that you don't be open about who you are as a person at your place of work. I entirely understand the feeling that law firms are stuffy and conservative, but the suggestion that you would make it to partnership level without having once revealed to your colleagues that you're gay is bizarre, unless you are out but are simply unsure about joining the group. Assuming the former (because the latter strikes me as odd - if you're out, then join - it's a social network, not a political resistance movement) why would you want to be a partner in a firm that doesn't even know the real you? I have worked in two magic circle firms. I was in the closet in the first and am out in the second. Yes, there are bigots in life, but I regret not being more honest about who I was at my previous firm. On reflection, I was living a lie - concealing my true self. I have not yet encountered any workplace discrimination since coming out. Join the LGBT group - it's a wonderful way to meet interesting people who share similar experiences. Be yourself, end of story.

AM -23 Nov 2007 | 15:35

I am an openly gay partner at a magic circle firm. I would not advise you to hide who you are; honesty and openness with colleagues is almost always the best policy. At the same time, I see little benefit of positioning yourself as a political activist, which joining the LGBT group could position you as. The point is not so much that big law firms are homophobic; it is that large, diverse service organisations are always distrustful of people who bring their personal agendas to the workplace - be it alliance to a political party, devotion to a social cause or strong religious faith. In a well-functioning service organisation, we should all be allowed to feel natural, open and at ease about who we are, but we should also be free of having the personal agendas of our colleagues thrust in our faces. It is possible to maintain a discrete balance between expecting your colleagues to accept who you are and making sure that the workplace is respected as a professional, work-oriented environment.

Out but discreet -11 Dec 2007 | 11:23

I'd at least find out whether there is a drinks/social function that this group organises, and go along, see what it's like. Ours are good fun. It's good for your career to make contacts in departments outside your own (whether they're gay or straight). Your group is probably also a member of the InterLaw network of law firms' LGBT groups, which can be a good way to meet people at other firms. You may be surprised at how gay-friendly your organisation turns out to be; if not, maybe you'd prefer to be somewhere that is gay-friendly.

Partner, Baker & McKenzie -07 Jan 2009 | 16:12